Somewhere in the middle of rushing between activities, places and people, somewhere in the crevices of our wall-to-wall work schedules, there is the time we take for ourselves. This is when we do something a little extra for ourselves-perhaps a hobby or simply to relax and focus our minds to reorganize our thoughts. A little R&R.
Often, in the struggle for balance, however, we forget just how much we should be doing. In one of my previous columns, “The Game of Running a Martial Arts School,” I presented the four levels of dedication: 1) Choosing not to play; 2) just playing; 3) not to lose; and 4) WIN, What’s Important Now. Most of us will find ourselves at one or more of these levels; and they relate directly to our struggle for balance in our lives. When you’re fully dedicated to the tasks at hand, the balance of work and play is easy to find and maintain. You will do what must be done and still have time to relax and play.
Many of us, however, live unbalanced lives. We don’t take care of business before pleasure. Our lives are filled with too many tasks and responsibilities. This is a common problem because we often forget exactly what we should be doing and, instead, focus our attention on all the extra activities. This loss of focus is what leads us astray from our goals and, as those who have been lost know, it’s not easy to return to your focused track.
For the most part, however, our inherent feelings or social upbringing helps us to know what we should do to succeed during our lives, and those are our flight plans. Everything else is a distraction.
I’ve known many martial arts school owners who, instead of teaching a basic curriculum from which their students are able to build knowledge, teach less useful, unnecessary course material; perhaps, techniques those school owners have invented, but are counterintuitive to the present curriculum. These confuse students and stunt the learning process. School owners who forget the basics may create Web sites for their schools, but not a basic brochure. In either instance, the school owner is failing to take care of basics first.
From another perspective, if I don’t dedicate sufficient time and energy to my marriage to my wife’s satisfaction, then whenever I buy her flowers, etc., she will see that gesture as trite and patronizing. If I’m an inattentive marriage partner, then I’ve overlooked a basic part of my life, and all the extras I expect from life become unnecessary and meaningless.
It’s a little known fact that, during a flight from Los Angeles to San Francisco, a plane is off-course 98% of the time. Minor corrections by the pilot, however, ensure the flight arrives at its destination, on time, and with no detours. As soon as the pilot notices that the plane is off-course, he makes a small adjustment. The passengers are satisfied because they arrive on time, and it’s because the pilot sticks to the flight plan.
Too many of us don’t have a flight plan for our lives and sometimes it’s difficult to know when we’re off course. For the most part, however, our inherent feelings or social upbringing helps us to know what we should do to succeed during our lives, and those are our flight plans. Everything else is a distraction.
Fariborz Azhakh is the owner and head instructor of Team Karate Centers Inc. in Woodland Hills, California, and produces martialinfo.com, one of world’s largest and most prestigious martial arts Web sites.
